Can you solve this mini-mystery?

Goon, Goon…Gone!

By S. Furlong-Bolliger


Guido ran a legitimate establishment. In fact, next to Angelo’s Ristorante on Archer Avenue, Guido’s was one of the best Italian eateries on the South Side. But business was slow; thanks to the Lambino crime family who had started frequenting his restaurant. Just the sight of the felonious Lambinos was enough to scare away any law abiding patron.

Tonight, Louis Lambino was celebrating his latest haul, a pair of diamond earrings. “You should have seen the guy’s face when I called in his loan. He couldn’t pay so I was about to break his legs until his wife offered me these. Almost two carats each,” he bragged, throwing the earrings down on the table and motioning for another bottle of Brunello. “Let’s celebrate, boys.”

Guido frowned. He knew the Lambinos would wine and dine the entire evening without paying a dime for the food. At this rate, he would be out of business by the end of the month. 

“Guido, where’s our food?” Louis bellowed. 

Guido brought out the plates and carefully placed each meal in front of the guys. They always ordered the same: linguini for Tony “Sticky Fingers” Lambino; tiramisu and cannolis for Sylvio “Sweet Tooth” Lambino; and for Louis Lambino, the best on the menu, lamb scottaditi. 

As he served, Guido couldn’t help but stare at the earrings. They were the largest he’d ever seen. Just one of those earrings would easily cover the Lambino’s tab for the whole year!

“Whatcha lookin’ at, Guido?” Sticky Fingers barked. 

“Yeah, don’t you be getting’ no ideas, Guido.” Sweet Tooth sneered, his gold tooth glimmering in the candlelight. 

Louis Lambino narrowed his eyes and motioned for Guido to leave. “Get out of here Guido, we’ve got business to discuss.”

Guido obeyed, scurrying to the corner of the room where he waited for the Lambinos to finish their meal. After they were done, he began clearing their plates, the cuff of his shirt scraping over the diamonds. He then carried the plates to the kitchen. When he returned a few minutes later with coffee and a take-out bag for Sweet Tooth’s leftover cannolis, the guys were yukking it up about their latest larcenous scheme. Suddenly, Louis exclaimed, “Hey, where’d the diamonds go?” He began searching the table. “They’re gone!”

“Gone?” Sticky Fingers asked, crouching down to look on the floor.

“Maybe you put them in your pocket?” Sweet Tooth suggested.

Louis turned red with rage and slammed his fist on the table. “No, I didn’t put nothing in my pocket. One of you stole my diamonds.” He pointed an accusing finger at the boys. “And you know how I deal with traitors.” He drew his finger across his throat and made a gagging sound.

“It wa …wasn’t me, Boss,” Sticky Fingers stammered. 

“Oh yeah?” Sweet Tooth countered. “They don’t call you Sticky Fingers for nothing.”

“No, honest, I didn’t steal them.” Sticky Fingers looked around wildly. “I bet it was him,” he said, pointing to Guido. “You saw the way he was eyeing the diamonds earlier.”

All eyes shifted to Guido.

“Yeah, that’s right,” agreed Louis. “Check him out, boys.”

Guido took a step back and held up his hands, his shirt cuffs sliding down his arms. “It wasn’t me, I swear. But I think I know where they are.” He looked Louis Lambino straight in the eye. “And if I’m right, you’ll owe me a favor.”

“Anything,” Louis promised.

Guido smiled.  He knew just what that favor would be.

What did Guido tell The Boss?

Please click here to reveal the answer.

Copyright 2015 S. Furlong-Bolliger. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission of the author is prohibited. OMDB! and OMDB! logos are trademarks of Over My Dead Body!

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